I want them to be single stem not already arranged. Not sure exactly what flowers I want yet just looking for some ideas on where I can go to buy them....Thanks
Where can I buy silk flowers online?
http://www.silkflowers.com/listproducts....
http://www.silkflowersexpress.com/
http://www.petals.com/
http://ww11.1800flowers.com/dataset.do?d...
http://www.silkflowersplus.com/
http://www.silkfever.com/index.asp?PageA...
http://fastsilkflowers.com/
Reply:Is there a reason you are looking to purchase them online?
There are quite a few places you can search online, but you may want to look locally, even if it is a short drive away, so that you can see what the flowers really look like.
Reply:silk flowers - http://www.wherecanbuycheaponline.com/sh...
Reply:Check out www.afloral.com! There are hundreds of flowers to browse through!
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
What will be the generalized form of the question given below, if i'll change no.of temples?
There are three temples and 3 wells arranged in an order of 1 well, 1 temple and so on.
The wells doubles the number of flowers when you wash flowers in them and after that you offer some flowers to the gods in the temple. Assuming you offer the same number of flowers in each temple, how many flowers should you start with that you are left with no flowers after you offer them at the last temple.
Answer:
You start with 7 flowers, double them and make them 14. Offer 8 in the first temple and go ahead with 6. Double them and make them 12. Offer 8 again and go ahead with 4.
Double of 4 would be 8 that you would offer in the third temple.
What will be the generalized form of the question given below, if i'll change no.of temples?
assume that you start with 'x' flowers .after the first wash the no: of flowers become 2x.assume that you place 'y' flowers in the temple.the total no: of flowers become 2x-y.when you wash them in the second well they become 4x-2y,placing y flowers again you have,4x-3y flowers remaining,after washing in the third well you will have 8x-6y flowers,after placing y flowers you have 8x-7y flowers,which are ultimately equal to 0
8x-7y=0
8x=7y
least common multiple of 8 and 7 is 56.
therefore x=7
y=8
multiples of 7 and 8 can also take the values of x%26amp;y respectively.you can observe the following pattern
for three temples you require to take 7 flowers and place 8 flowers after doubling.
similarly you have to take 14 flowers for four temples and have to place 16 flowers after doubling.henceforth we can observe that
no: of flowers temples
7 3
14 4
..
.
.
.
. .
7(n-2) (n-2)
7n+12 n
therefore for n temples you need to take 7n+12 flowers and have to offer 8n+16 flowers to god.
Reply:Let n = number of temples (and wells)
then 2^n is the number of flowers to offer at each, and 2^n - 1 is the number of flowers to start with.
Reply:The way to solve this is to work backwards:
Let x = no. of flowers that you give each temple.
So, ((x/2 + x)/2 + x)/2 = 7x/8 = number of flowers at beginning
Since we're dealing with integers only, x can be any multiple of 8, and no. of flowers we start with corresponds to 7x/8.
So there are infinite solutions:
7,8
14,16
21,24
etc.
The wells doubles the number of flowers when you wash flowers in them and after that you offer some flowers to the gods in the temple. Assuming you offer the same number of flowers in each temple, how many flowers should you start with that you are left with no flowers after you offer them at the last temple.
Answer:
You start with 7 flowers, double them and make them 14. Offer 8 in the first temple and go ahead with 6. Double them and make them 12. Offer 8 again and go ahead with 4.
Double of 4 would be 8 that you would offer in the third temple.
What will be the generalized form of the question given below, if i'll change no.of temples?
assume that you start with 'x' flowers .after the first wash the no: of flowers become 2x.assume that you place 'y' flowers in the temple.the total no: of flowers become 2x-y.when you wash them in the second well they become 4x-2y,placing y flowers again you have,4x-3y flowers remaining,after washing in the third well you will have 8x-6y flowers,after placing y flowers you have 8x-7y flowers,which are ultimately equal to 0
8x-7y=0
8x=7y
least common multiple of 8 and 7 is 56.
therefore x=7
y=8
multiples of 7 and 8 can also take the values of x%26amp;y respectively.you can observe the following pattern
for three temples you require to take 7 flowers and place 8 flowers after doubling.
similarly you have to take 14 flowers for four temples and have to place 16 flowers after doubling.henceforth we can observe that
no: of flowers temples
7 3
14 4
..
.
.
.
. .
7(n-2) (n-2)
7n+12 n
therefore for n temples you need to take 7n+12 flowers and have to offer 8n+16 flowers to god.
Reply:Let n = number of temples (and wells)
then 2^n is the number of flowers to offer at each, and 2^n - 1 is the number of flowers to start with.
Reply:The way to solve this is to work backwards:
Let x = no. of flowers that you give each temple.
So, ((x/2 + x)/2 + x)/2 = 7x/8 = number of flowers at beginning
Since we're dealing with integers only, x can be any multiple of 8, and no. of flowers we start with corresponds to 7x/8.
So there are infinite solutions:
7,8
14,16
21,24
etc.
Looking for Water Lilies or lotus?
I am desperate looking for "Nymphaea" AKA watter lilies, i would even set up for lotus.
I need to find a florist that can arrange a bouquete of this flowers, and ship it to manhattan, kansas i will pay anything for it. i have being trough several sites but i have only found dead ends. please help me.
Looking for Water Lilies or lotus?
I have some in my mobile !
Or visit http://net-new.blogspot.com and
also to visit http://netnew.spaces.live.com/ and search for
I need to find a florist that can arrange a bouquete of this flowers, and ship it to manhattan, kansas i will pay anything for it. i have being trough several sites but i have only found dead ends. please help me.
Looking for Water Lilies or lotus?
I have some in my mobile !
Or visit http://net-new.blogspot.com and
also to visit http://netnew.spaces.live.com/ and search for
June flowers for wedding bouquets?
We set a date! June 19, 2010!! I'm so excited! I was wondering though, what kinds of flowers bloom in June? I'm going to have my brother make all of the corsages and bouts and bouquets (he took courses to do this when he was in high school, and he's really amazing at it!) He's also going to arrange all the flowers for my wedding (which will be potted flowers that we will ask our parents to plant in their yards after the wedding). So, I was wondering, what kinds of flowers are common in June? (by common I mean in season) Thanks!
June flowers for wedding bouquets?
Gerber Daisies they came in a bunch of different colors too
Reply:you can go to a flower market and get any flower they are all grown in greenhouses so it really isn't a problem getting the flowers, but if you want june flowers because of the wedding date then lavender, sweet peas, roses, delphinium.
Reply:Flowers are common whenever you plant them basically. You can pick something that's going to be really easy to grow, and that's going to go with everything. You could pick your favorite flower even.
Reply:Lilies bloom in June. Here are some others that you might consider:
peonies
some varieties of clematis
roses
delphinium
foxglove
madevilla
shoes stock
June flowers for wedding bouquets?
Gerber Daisies they came in a bunch of different colors too
Reply:you can go to a flower market and get any flower they are all grown in greenhouses so it really isn't a problem getting the flowers, but if you want june flowers because of the wedding date then lavender, sweet peas, roses, delphinium.
Reply:Flowers are common whenever you plant them basically. You can pick something that's going to be really easy to grow, and that's going to go with everything. You could pick your favorite flower even.
Reply:Lilies bloom in June. Here are some others that you might consider:
peonies
some varieties of clematis
roses
delphinium
foxglove
madevilla
shoes stock
Im on a budget and have botten the vases for centerpiece...is $25 for flowers for each centerpiece?
Is $25 enough for flowers and the cost of someone arranging them? I was thinking of a simple arragement of hydrangeas and roses (about 3-4 hydrangeas and about 6 roses of diff colors)......
Im on a budget and have botten the vases for centerpiece...is $25 for flowers for each centerpiece?
try buying your flowers at a place like sams club or costco. they are not that hard to make yourself. that is what i did at my wedding. my mother in-law helped me. we made the center pieces and the boquets. we bought the flowers from sams club.
Reply:It's bought - not botten.
And who knows what flowers cost in LA except a florist - or someone who can buy wholesale?
The hydrangeas and roses do sound lovely, though.
Reply:you would be surprised, even in LA. If you have a clear vision of what you want the centerpieces to look like and limit yourself to just a couple of flower varieties, you should be able to do it. Call up your local Trader Joe's and speak to them about buying flowers in bulk. They won't give you a discount, because their prices are already really LOW but they will order the flowers you want from their supplier, and have them delivered to their store the morning that you need them. You can specify what quantity of what color flower, within reason and you will know ahead of time that you can get your desired choices and how much it will cost. Hydrangeas are typically not expensive, and you can get very good prices on small roses there. I would give it a shot. I made beautiful centerpieces for my daughter's christening reception and bought my flowers from TJs. I did all white tulips and they only cost me $4.49 for each bunch of 10. With the vases I bought and some pretty fabric ribbon to match my decor, I had stunning centerpieces for less than $10. For $25 you should be able to do something nice.
Reply:That seems like too much to me. Since you're on a budget, have you considered the possibility of arranging your centerpiece bouquets yourself? It's pretty easy. Just go to a flower shop (or actually even a grocery store- their floral depts. these days are awesome!) and purchase enough roses and hydrangeas to put in each vase, then arrange with some inexpensive fern filler, baby's breath, or just on their own.
Reply:I think $25 should cover the flowers alone but not the florist. I agree that you can probably arrange it yourself.
Reply:I doubt it.
Reply:Barbara - I think she meant "gotten". Relax....
I think hydrangeas are gorgeous and are a great choice for centerpieces because the blooms are large/broad. I would buy the flowers and arrange yourself if you're trying to stay within a budget. Good luck!
Reply:$25 would be enough per centerpiece if you made them yourself. You can buy the vases and then get flowers (and some greenery) from either a wholesale club or a grocery store. Ask comeone creative in your wedding party to come with you to get the flowers and to make the arrangements.
Im on a budget and have botten the vases for centerpiece...is $25 for flowers for each centerpiece?
try buying your flowers at a place like sams club or costco. they are not that hard to make yourself. that is what i did at my wedding. my mother in-law helped me. we made the center pieces and the boquets. we bought the flowers from sams club.
Reply:It's bought - not botten.
And who knows what flowers cost in LA except a florist - or someone who can buy wholesale?
The hydrangeas and roses do sound lovely, though.
Reply:you would be surprised, even in LA. If you have a clear vision of what you want the centerpieces to look like and limit yourself to just a couple of flower varieties, you should be able to do it. Call up your local Trader Joe's and speak to them about buying flowers in bulk. They won't give you a discount, because their prices are already really LOW but they will order the flowers you want from their supplier, and have them delivered to their store the morning that you need them. You can specify what quantity of what color flower, within reason and you will know ahead of time that you can get your desired choices and how much it will cost. Hydrangeas are typically not expensive, and you can get very good prices on small roses there. I would give it a shot. I made beautiful centerpieces for my daughter's christening reception and bought my flowers from TJs. I did all white tulips and they only cost me $4.49 for each bunch of 10. With the vases I bought and some pretty fabric ribbon to match my decor, I had stunning centerpieces for less than $10. For $25 you should be able to do something nice.
Reply:That seems like too much to me. Since you're on a budget, have you considered the possibility of arranging your centerpiece bouquets yourself? It's pretty easy. Just go to a flower shop (or actually even a grocery store- their floral depts. these days are awesome!) and purchase enough roses and hydrangeas to put in each vase, then arrange with some inexpensive fern filler, baby's breath, or just on their own.
Reply:I think $25 should cover the flowers alone but not the florist. I agree that you can probably arrange it yourself.
Reply:I doubt it.
Reply:Barbara - I think she meant "gotten". Relax....
I think hydrangeas are gorgeous and are a great choice for centerpieces because the blooms are large/broad. I would buy the flowers and arrange yourself if you're trying to stay within a budget. Good luck!
Reply:$25 would be enough per centerpiece if you made them yourself. You can buy the vases and then get flowers (and some greenery) from either a wholesale club or a grocery store. Ask comeone creative in your wedding party to come with you to get the flowers and to make the arrangements.
My wife will be induced Friday, and I have a few questions?
We took childbirth classes together, and my wife is adamant about not receiving painkillers, which is fine. The problem is I really love my wife, and I will hate seeing her in so much pain. So what are some tips on maintaining my cool so I can be as supportive as she needs me to be?
Also, I have arranged flowers to be delivered after the birth, and I'll be giving her a diamond tennis bracelet, I brought for her in the beginning of her pregnancy. Do you think she'll find that to be a little much, or do you think she'd like it? I would ask one of her friends, but they'd probably tell her.
Thanks in advance for any suggestions.
My wife will be induced Friday, and I have a few questions?
oh wow, you are a really nice husband... i didn't get flowers.. that sucks for me !! =) i think that is very nice and very thoughtful... as for you to keep your cool... just stand by her side, and tell her to breath, and just remember it is not constant pain.. she will be ok.. tell her thank you for giving me the most beautiful child in the world, remind her how pretty she is, and that you thank god for giving someone soo special to you!! good luck !! =)
Reply:well you are so sweet.
But since she isn't going to take the drugs, and will be in a lot of pain. Stay out of her way and don't let the nurses bully her. they might bully because she might be so cranky with the tremendous amount of pain.
Don't be mean to the nurses your self of course but let the know you ain't gonna take no crap off of them.
Being in labor twice i know how irritating it can be people taking pictures and people hovering over me and wanting to help and bless every ones heart i know they meant well but they have to understand sometime you have to stand back and let them get thru that contration. I personally liked my belly rubbed after a contraction maybe you can do that for her after one but durring she might be like BACK OFF!!! lol you will do fine
Reply:I don't think anyone remembers the pain after seeing that baby, so try to remember that.
Don't get offended by anything she says while in labor - she doesn't mean it.
Maybe tell her before what you told us - that you really love her and will hate seeing her in pain, so if she does change her mind and decides she needs/wants painkillers, she doesn't feel like she has to be brave and skip them for you (women who are induced may have stronger contractions meaning even more pain)
Let her know you're scared too, and if she can, it would help if she could tell you what she needs, like if she needs her back rubbed, or wants to get up and walk, or try a different position, so you can be her advocate and make sure the hospital staff allows her to do what she wants within reason.
And no, she won't find your gifts to be too much. They show how much you love her. You'll be a great dad because you love and respect your wife/baby's mommy.
Congratulations on your new baby!!!
Reply:Just keep your cool coz she will be relying on your to be the level-headed one, and make sure that the drs dont do anything that she doesnt want, incase she is unable to clearly communicate with them. Just be sensitive and try to do what you think she needs, but follow her lead if she doesnt like it. For the gifts thats awesome but I dont think do it to soon after she has baby coz she'll be too wasted to enjoy the moment or appreciate it, wait until shes freshened up, had a rest and is feeling more lively. Good luck.
Reply:I was induced as well and I also chose not to have an epidural. The induction didn't work as planned. I thought for sure that I'd go into labor in an instant but i didn't finally go into labor till they broke my water. Just be by her side and let her do her thing. She'll let you know what she needs...I was crying and holding tight to my husband's sleeve, burying my face in his arm to get thru the pain. My baby was face up/sunny side up. So I had alot of back labor. There were definitely times that I told my husband I wanted an epidural and he gently reminded me that That is not what I really want. He reminded me to breathe and kept saying I can do it.....finally I said I can't take it and the nurse offered Stadol to take the edge off. I am happy with that decision cuz I was not completely numb like with an epidural. Pretty much, I felt all the contractions but in between I was able to sleep and rest up for the next wave of contractions. It was a life saver.
My plan was to wait long enough on an epidural so that when I finally asked for one it would be too late to get one. It worked!
She'll be in pain so she may not have a clear head. If she is adamant about no epidural then it's up to you to remind her that she CAN get thru the pain and that she doesn't want a painkiller. Really talk out a plan with her ahead of time. The BEST thing you can do is support her decisions for childbirth.
Reply:Why is she being induced? Are you aware that induction often leads to a more painful labour? The contractions are often more intense, and harder to cope with; many induced women feel the need for painkillers, whom would otherwise cope just fine with a normal labour. This is especially the case with syntocinon (drip) induced labours, and ARM. (Link below with more info on inductions.)
"Overdue" is not a good reason for induction unless she's 42 weeks or over, and there are signs of fetal distress. Did you know that the average pregnancy duration of a non-induced (and non c-section'ed) healthy caucasian woman having her first baby is *not* in fact 40 weeks, its 41 weeks and 1 day? (Reference below)
Do consider encouraging your wife to cancel the induction, and to wait for labour to start naturally, so her natural hormonal pain relief will kick in, and contractions will build up more gradually and naturally (easier to cope with), and be less intense.
In terms of ways for you to help with pain relief: massage, back rubs, verbal encouragement, hold a hot water bottle or heat pack on the small of her back, hold her, help her labour in upright positions (sitting, walking, squatting, leaning on you).
To support her goal of labouring without pain relief, presuming you're going to hospital, tell the midwives/nurses/ob on duty that your wife wishes no pain relief, and to *not offer it* - if she needs it, she will *ask* for it. Its much easier to labour without pain relief if people aren't constantly offering it. If she *does* ask for it during labour, encourage her to wait out a few more contractions, and see how she goes; tell her she's doing great, and every contraction is bringing her closer to meeting her baby. Essentially, stall her, and offer encouragement about how well she's doing.
Its very common during transition (a stage of labour shortly before crowning/birthing) for women to say "I can't do this", or "get me out of here" or "I'm going to die" or "give me drugs". Recognise that often this is a plea for support and reassurance, and often a signal that birth is close.
Good luck! And BTW, the present is a lovely idea. Diamonds are never too much. ;)
:)Bronwyn
Reply:wow!.. you are going to win some fans in here!!
no its not too much.. its loveley
one piece of advice: No matter what she says during the delivery, she does not want to kill, maim, or torture you..lol
she will be in incredible pain, and there really is nothing you can do physically for her, apart from give her ice to suck on, rub her back (which she will scream at you is not helping)..
maybe dangle the bracelt in fron of her and say if she doesnt rip your head off this is what she will get!!
honestly though, its so hard to tell how she will go through the labour just stay there, stay calm and look forward to your beautiful child at the end!!
good luck!!
Reply:my husband was pretty supportive by talking me through my pregnancy i chose to go without pain killers , he always reminded me if i wanted to take them it wont be little me in anyway that many do it ... and massaged my back at all time ... just stay by her ... dont get irritated cuz she wil b very very moody the gifts seem beautiful ... she is lucky to have such a wonderful husband
best of luck or doing a great job
Reply:When you see her in that much pain it will be very hard for you not to be like if you need them you can it will be ok...my boyfriend did that...I did mine without medication and it was the best choice I ever made...but when I was in labor it worked better for me if nobody talked to me as far and I picked a state of mind and I just stuck with it and focused and breathed but there was a time during my labor I thought about getting the drugs and my bf said to me if you want to you can I know that you are hurting and it is very hard to watch this...he also almost fainted when I was crowning...the birth of your child is amazing and I really hope she doesn't change her mind about getting pain killers...oh and breathing is the only thing that will get her threw this...GOOD LUCK
Reply:wow
do you have a single brother
oh sorry I'm already married myself
I just want to say she's very lucky :)
and bring her a little squeezy stress ball or make sure she has one packed,, to save your hand from being crushed during the contractions. and make sure to have a full pitcher of (ice?) water and a glass for her, well maybe not glass..... plastic would be okay :) so she has drink and you dont have to leave her side except to fill the pitcher back up
congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:Wow... If only MY hubby was as kind and thoughtful as what you are! I was induced as well and after 50+ hours of labour, having massive seizures and ending witha c-section he told me that "I could've done it better" and that the reason I had complications was because I "just gave in to the pain...".
I don't think that its too much, I think that your wife will appreciate it. Especially since she has just put her body through a marathon to bring you a precious child. Any woman that has experienced labour will tell you that it's really nice to be appreciated for what they have just done. To go through child birth is incredibly exhausting so praise and gifts to show her how much you Do appreciate her and how much you love her is exactly what she needs.
Labour is hard for most women and good on you for wanting to support her and her decision NOT to have pain relief. You may find that she'll want to change her mind and thats ok as well. What you need to do to stay calm is remind yourself that each contraction is helping her. Envision every pain as if its massaging her cervix to coax it open so your baby can come out. Take deep breaths and focus on the end result- as hard as that will be, that is what gets you through. Tell yourself that although she is in pain, that its a purposeful pain. Its not like breaking your leg, all that pain is there for a resason and its doing something.
Good luck, take care and I hope your wife knows just how lucky she is to have you.
Reply:i had an induced labor, i had contractoins after the induction they were severe, and i had the epidural at once, couldnt stand the pain, my husband was really so symapathetic with me , and i knew how much he loved coz he was so sad seeing me like that, but i got the epidural at once and then i was smiling , and he wasnt sympathetic anymore:-(, just kidding :-). hold ur wife's hand , help her with the pushing. if she changes her mind after the contractions about the painkiller and wanted epidural , support her and also read abt em , who knows what could happen.
my husband brought me flowers, that was so thoughtful of him, i do love him soo much.
the most important thing to take care of her after giving birth, offer to take the baby so she could have somesleep, offer her water , juice if she is breastfeeding, go and kiss her every now and then, she will be in a terrible mood because of the change in hormones, fix her breakfast , and dnt wait for her to ask these things , offering them will show her how much u are thinking abt her and her baby .
good luck and congratulations:-).
Reply:The fact that you pre-arranged for flowers to be delivered says a lot. I'd be happy enough with that. The bracelet is just icing on the cake, as long as its jewelry that she would like any other day of the week, I don't see why it wouldn't make a great 'birth' present, she is bringing your child into the world.
As for seeing her in pain, try to avoid doing the 'are you ok' thing every 5 seconds. No one wants to hear that question constantly, and to be sure, the answer is going to be no and she just might yell at you. Just remember that its her choice to go through that pain. Ask her 'is there anything you need' once in a while, but don't over do it. And good luck, it sounds like you guys are really well prepared for this.
Reply:the gifts are wonderful! she will be happy... I had 2 kids both with no pain meds, or epid... and it was great just having my husband there holding my hand, rubbing my back, or just reassuring me everything was going to be ok..
congrats and good luck!
Reply:awww that is so sweet, i think she will love it. just stay by her side and be as strong and comforting as possible, and be the same is she changes her mine. good luck
Reply:That's perfect. She will love the gifts, but she'll love your support even more. A+ husband!
Reply:You sound like a really sweet guy.
My husband was also worried about seeing me in pain. So I told him that it was REALLY important to me to do the birth with no pain medication and the best thing he can do is be strong and supportive and have an attitude of strength to pull me up, not be looking all worried as this will not keep me motivated.
He was FANTASTIC. He said things like, come on, you can do this, he reminded me how proud he was of me and that he believed in me. I could not have done it without him.
He gave me diamond earrings after the birth and I have not yet taken them out. I think it is a lovely gesture.
Best of luck.
Reply:I said I didn't want pain meds either. I was induced. I changed my mind. If she changes her mind do not tell her but honey you wanted... Let her decide when she is there experiencing it.
I think it is a beautiful idea to give her presents. Having a baby is wonderful and hard. The presents just tell her how much you love her and appreciate what she has gone through for you and your family and her too.
As far as keeping your cool, take deep breaths and just remember, we don't remember how the pain felt. We remember it hurt but when we see that baby for the first time it all goes away. She will be ok and so will you. Good luck and congrats.
Also, I have arranged flowers to be delivered after the birth, and I'll be giving her a diamond tennis bracelet, I brought for her in the beginning of her pregnancy. Do you think she'll find that to be a little much, or do you think she'd like it? I would ask one of her friends, but they'd probably tell her.
Thanks in advance for any suggestions.
My wife will be induced Friday, and I have a few questions?
oh wow, you are a really nice husband... i didn't get flowers.. that sucks for me !! =) i think that is very nice and very thoughtful... as for you to keep your cool... just stand by her side, and tell her to breath, and just remember it is not constant pain.. she will be ok.. tell her thank you for giving me the most beautiful child in the world, remind her how pretty she is, and that you thank god for giving someone soo special to you!! good luck !! =)
Reply:well you are so sweet.
But since she isn't going to take the drugs, and will be in a lot of pain. Stay out of her way and don't let the nurses bully her. they might bully because she might be so cranky with the tremendous amount of pain.
Don't be mean to the nurses your self of course but let the know you ain't gonna take no crap off of them.
Being in labor twice i know how irritating it can be people taking pictures and people hovering over me and wanting to help and bless every ones heart i know they meant well but they have to understand sometime you have to stand back and let them get thru that contration. I personally liked my belly rubbed after a contraction maybe you can do that for her after one but durring she might be like BACK OFF!!! lol you will do fine
Reply:I don't think anyone remembers the pain after seeing that baby, so try to remember that.
Don't get offended by anything she says while in labor - she doesn't mean it.
Maybe tell her before what you told us - that you really love her and will hate seeing her in pain, so if she does change her mind and decides she needs/wants painkillers, she doesn't feel like she has to be brave and skip them for you (women who are induced may have stronger contractions meaning even more pain)
Let her know you're scared too, and if she can, it would help if she could tell you what she needs, like if she needs her back rubbed, or wants to get up and walk, or try a different position, so you can be her advocate and make sure the hospital staff allows her to do what she wants within reason.
And no, she won't find your gifts to be too much. They show how much you love her. You'll be a great dad because you love and respect your wife/baby's mommy.
Congratulations on your new baby!!!
Reply:Just keep your cool coz she will be relying on your to be the level-headed one, and make sure that the drs dont do anything that she doesnt want, incase she is unable to clearly communicate with them. Just be sensitive and try to do what you think she needs, but follow her lead if she doesnt like it. For the gifts thats awesome but I dont think do it to soon after she has baby coz she'll be too wasted to enjoy the moment or appreciate it, wait until shes freshened up, had a rest and is feeling more lively. Good luck.
Reply:I was induced as well and I also chose not to have an epidural. The induction didn't work as planned. I thought for sure that I'd go into labor in an instant but i didn't finally go into labor till they broke my water. Just be by her side and let her do her thing. She'll let you know what she needs...I was crying and holding tight to my husband's sleeve, burying my face in his arm to get thru the pain. My baby was face up/sunny side up. So I had alot of back labor. There were definitely times that I told my husband I wanted an epidural and he gently reminded me that That is not what I really want. He reminded me to breathe and kept saying I can do it.....finally I said I can't take it and the nurse offered Stadol to take the edge off. I am happy with that decision cuz I was not completely numb like with an epidural. Pretty much, I felt all the contractions but in between I was able to sleep and rest up for the next wave of contractions. It was a life saver.
My plan was to wait long enough on an epidural so that when I finally asked for one it would be too late to get one. It worked!
She'll be in pain so she may not have a clear head. If she is adamant about no epidural then it's up to you to remind her that she CAN get thru the pain and that she doesn't want a painkiller. Really talk out a plan with her ahead of time. The BEST thing you can do is support her decisions for childbirth.
Reply:Why is she being induced? Are you aware that induction often leads to a more painful labour? The contractions are often more intense, and harder to cope with; many induced women feel the need for painkillers, whom would otherwise cope just fine with a normal labour. This is especially the case with syntocinon (drip) induced labours, and ARM. (Link below with more info on inductions.)
"Overdue" is not a good reason for induction unless she's 42 weeks or over, and there are signs of fetal distress. Did you know that the average pregnancy duration of a non-induced (and non c-section'ed) healthy caucasian woman having her first baby is *not* in fact 40 weeks, its 41 weeks and 1 day? (Reference below)
Do consider encouraging your wife to cancel the induction, and to wait for labour to start naturally, so her natural hormonal pain relief will kick in, and contractions will build up more gradually and naturally (easier to cope with), and be less intense.
In terms of ways for you to help with pain relief: massage, back rubs, verbal encouragement, hold a hot water bottle or heat pack on the small of her back, hold her, help her labour in upright positions (sitting, walking, squatting, leaning on you).
To support her goal of labouring without pain relief, presuming you're going to hospital, tell the midwives/nurses/ob on duty that your wife wishes no pain relief, and to *not offer it* - if she needs it, she will *ask* for it. Its much easier to labour without pain relief if people aren't constantly offering it. If she *does* ask for it during labour, encourage her to wait out a few more contractions, and see how she goes; tell her she's doing great, and every contraction is bringing her closer to meeting her baby. Essentially, stall her, and offer encouragement about how well she's doing.
Its very common during transition (a stage of labour shortly before crowning/birthing) for women to say "I can't do this", or "get me out of here" or "I'm going to die" or "give me drugs". Recognise that often this is a plea for support and reassurance, and often a signal that birth is close.
Good luck! And BTW, the present is a lovely idea. Diamonds are never too much. ;)
:)Bronwyn
Reply:wow!.. you are going to win some fans in here!!
no its not too much.. its loveley
one piece of advice: No matter what she says during the delivery, she does not want to kill, maim, or torture you..lol
she will be in incredible pain, and there really is nothing you can do physically for her, apart from give her ice to suck on, rub her back (which she will scream at you is not helping)..
maybe dangle the bracelt in fron of her and say if she doesnt rip your head off this is what she will get!!
honestly though, its so hard to tell how she will go through the labour just stay there, stay calm and look forward to your beautiful child at the end!!
good luck!!
Reply:my husband was pretty supportive by talking me through my pregnancy i chose to go without pain killers , he always reminded me if i wanted to take them it wont be little me in anyway that many do it ... and massaged my back at all time ... just stay by her ... dont get irritated cuz she wil b very very moody the gifts seem beautiful ... she is lucky to have such a wonderful husband
best of luck or doing a great job
Reply:When you see her in that much pain it will be very hard for you not to be like if you need them you can it will be ok...my boyfriend did that...I did mine without medication and it was the best choice I ever made...but when I was in labor it worked better for me if nobody talked to me as far and I picked a state of mind and I just stuck with it and focused and breathed but there was a time during my labor I thought about getting the drugs and my bf said to me if you want to you can I know that you are hurting and it is very hard to watch this...he also almost fainted when I was crowning...the birth of your child is amazing and I really hope she doesn't change her mind about getting pain killers...oh and breathing is the only thing that will get her threw this...GOOD LUCK
Reply:wow
do you have a single brother
oh sorry I'm already married myself
I just want to say she's very lucky :)
and bring her a little squeezy stress ball or make sure she has one packed,, to save your hand from being crushed during the contractions. and make sure to have a full pitcher of (ice?) water and a glass for her, well maybe not glass..... plastic would be okay :) so she has drink and you dont have to leave her side except to fill the pitcher back up
congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:Wow... If only MY hubby was as kind and thoughtful as what you are! I was induced as well and after 50+ hours of labour, having massive seizures and ending witha c-section he told me that "I could've done it better" and that the reason I had complications was because I "just gave in to the pain...".
I don't think that its too much, I think that your wife will appreciate it. Especially since she has just put her body through a marathon to bring you a precious child. Any woman that has experienced labour will tell you that it's really nice to be appreciated for what they have just done. To go through child birth is incredibly exhausting so praise and gifts to show her how much you Do appreciate her and how much you love her is exactly what she needs.
Labour is hard for most women and good on you for wanting to support her and her decision NOT to have pain relief. You may find that she'll want to change her mind and thats ok as well. What you need to do to stay calm is remind yourself that each contraction is helping her. Envision every pain as if its massaging her cervix to coax it open so your baby can come out. Take deep breaths and focus on the end result- as hard as that will be, that is what gets you through. Tell yourself that although she is in pain, that its a purposeful pain. Its not like breaking your leg, all that pain is there for a resason and its doing something.
Good luck, take care and I hope your wife knows just how lucky she is to have you.
Reply:i had an induced labor, i had contractoins after the induction they were severe, and i had the epidural at once, couldnt stand the pain, my husband was really so symapathetic with me , and i knew how much he loved coz he was so sad seeing me like that, but i got the epidural at once and then i was smiling , and he wasnt sympathetic anymore:-(, just kidding :-). hold ur wife's hand , help her with the pushing. if she changes her mind after the contractions about the painkiller and wanted epidural , support her and also read abt em , who knows what could happen.
my husband brought me flowers, that was so thoughtful of him, i do love him soo much.
the most important thing to take care of her after giving birth, offer to take the baby so she could have somesleep, offer her water , juice if she is breastfeeding, go and kiss her every now and then, she will be in a terrible mood because of the change in hormones, fix her breakfast , and dnt wait for her to ask these things , offering them will show her how much u are thinking abt her and her baby .
good luck and congratulations:-).
Reply:The fact that you pre-arranged for flowers to be delivered says a lot. I'd be happy enough with that. The bracelet is just icing on the cake, as long as its jewelry that she would like any other day of the week, I don't see why it wouldn't make a great 'birth' present, she is bringing your child into the world.
As for seeing her in pain, try to avoid doing the 'are you ok' thing every 5 seconds. No one wants to hear that question constantly, and to be sure, the answer is going to be no and she just might yell at you. Just remember that its her choice to go through that pain. Ask her 'is there anything you need' once in a while, but don't over do it. And good luck, it sounds like you guys are really well prepared for this.
Reply:the gifts are wonderful! she will be happy... I had 2 kids both with no pain meds, or epid... and it was great just having my husband there holding my hand, rubbing my back, or just reassuring me everything was going to be ok..
congrats and good luck!
Reply:awww that is so sweet, i think she will love it. just stay by her side and be as strong and comforting as possible, and be the same is she changes her mine. good luck
Reply:That's perfect. She will love the gifts, but she'll love your support even more. A+ husband!
Reply:You sound like a really sweet guy.
My husband was also worried about seeing me in pain. So I told him that it was REALLY important to me to do the birth with no pain medication and the best thing he can do is be strong and supportive and have an attitude of strength to pull me up, not be looking all worried as this will not keep me motivated.
He was FANTASTIC. He said things like, come on, you can do this, he reminded me how proud he was of me and that he believed in me. I could not have done it without him.
He gave me diamond earrings after the birth and I have not yet taken them out. I think it is a lovely gesture.
Best of luck.
Reply:I said I didn't want pain meds either. I was induced. I changed my mind. If she changes her mind do not tell her but honey you wanted... Let her decide when she is there experiencing it.
I think it is a beautiful idea to give her presents. Having a baby is wonderful and hard. The presents just tell her how much you love her and appreciate what she has gone through for you and your family and her too.
As far as keeping your cool, take deep breaths and just remember, we don't remember how the pain felt. We remember it hurt but when we see that baby for the first time it all goes away. She will be ok and so will you. Good luck and congrats.
Are you becoming a victim of the US Wedding industry?
The wedding industry in the US is a huge business where couples (or their parents) run up credit card bills beyond what they can afford. With flowers in the thousands of dollars, extravagant locations, dresses not quite worth the fabric they’re made from and brides who complain and are never satisfied.
It seems some weddings are no longer a celebration of love but a show of money! I am in this business and I see it all.
Remember ‘home made weddings’ when aunts prepared their favorite food, sisters and cousins would decorate and arrange flowers, while mom and bride made favors and the veil! It was a time to reflect, to enjoy family, to share the experience.
In other countries this is still the norm, but does the US consumer mentality and the wedding industry that encourages it, forget what a wedding is for?
What, in your opinion %26amp; country is the most essential part of a wedding, what is/was your budget, what did you end up spending %26amp; what would you do different?
Are you becoming a victim of the US Wedding industry?
A B S O L U T E L Y
I agree that the meaining and sacredness of the event is lost and more people are interested in outdoing the next bride and having a party of all parties.
Reply:I agree and I don't....
personally I think it's ridiculous to put yourself into debt for one day. You have your whole lives to plan for and prepare for. Of course you want it to be nice but there is nice and than there is extravagant.
But if you want that... and you have the money to do so (not by charging it all on credit cards) that is totally your business.
Personally my wedding is in March.... we wanted to keep things small and simple, but very nice. We are using friends for DJ and family for photographer. My mom bargained for my dress and I am using her veil and the flower girl dress for my flower girl from her wedding. We are making lots of things. But our wedding is still coming in at about 8000 - 10000 because anything wedding related is so expensive and I think that is the problem with the industry some places really rip you off.
For example you can call and get prices for flowers but if they know the flowers are for a wedding they immediately charge more sometimes.... that's crazy!
I'm happy with our day and I've cut a lot corners and I have two other friends getting married after me or are spending MUCH more and they think I'm crazy... but I bet that my wedding will be as nice as thiers and at the end of the day I'll be just as married lol
Reply:I know a couple who are still $20,000 in debt due to a lavish wedding, 2 years after the DIVORCE! Can you imagine how awful it would be to still be paying for a wedding after you get a divorce. :(
Reply:The wedding industry is like any other. Driven by demand, it is not entirely fair to blame "the industry" without looking at the consumers. Those individuals who run up their credit cards for their wedding will probably go on to run up their credit cards on a plasma tv or vacation. They are victims of a larger problem. The rest of us plan weddings we can afford. I may be a victim to wanting a gorgeous wedding, but if I can afford it whats the problem? Everyone spends their money how they want based on their preferences; thats just simple economics.
Reply:Everyone plans for that one day, they do nothing to prepare for the marriage! It is really sad...that is why there are so many "starter" marriages!!
Reply:We're a US couple, and are resisting getting sucked into the wedding industry vortex. We, do, however want a basically traditional American wedding, like the ones our parents and siblings and friends had. We're living within a budget that's based on how much we could reasonably expect to save between the engagement and the wedding. We agreed not to go into debt for the wedding. So, we're working the wedding around the budget--how many guests, what kind of food, the flowers, the music, photographer, etc. are all tested against the budget. We're a bit ahead on the savings plan, so we're not having to cut things that we had decided on early. But, we're not spending a lot on many things (a couple of hundred on flowers, not a couple of thousand, about a hundred on my wedding dress, we bargained with the DJ and photographer, we're making our own invitations, programs, place cards, reply cards and thank-you cards, using a family heirloom ring, making my veil and the favors and centerpieces, no limo, postponing the honeymoon for four months after the wedding). It's going to be beautiful, but within our $12,000 budget, no debt.
Really, the only critical part of the wedding is the he, I, an officiant and two witnesses be there. Everything else is extra.
Reply:According to Forbes the average US wedding is something like $26,000. This is outrageous and ridiculous.
What's really crazy is that some couples take out loans and get into huge debts just to have this 'perfect' wedding. Then they live in some crappy rented apartment, when they could have used the wedding money as a down payment on a nice house.
Reply:Weddings and Funerals are the worst industries out there because they prey on human emotion and they get you when you are at your most vulnerable.
People should always go for the wedding that they can afford rather than the wedding of their dreams, or, wait until they can afford the wedding of their dreams without selling their soul to the credit card companies. Some people do not have self control and you cannot blame anyone for that.
Good luck
Reply:We don't have a budget-we're spending whatever it costs to get the things we want. We will end up spending about $25-30K when it's all said and done.
I do not recall home made weddings-I'm 38 years old and never been to one in my life and have also never personally known anyone who has had one. We just don't do that where I'm from (NE Pennsylvania).
I figure I waited 38 years to marry the man of my dreams (first wedding for both of us), and we earn income sufficient to not have to worry about every single cent we spend. We're doing our wedding our way, and things cost money. We'll earn more.
We aren't having any bridal party, no programs or favors, only spending $200 on the photographer, and less than that on flowers. His wedding attire only cost $65. We are, however spending lots of plane tix and hotel rooms for our families to fly to St Thomas, wine and dine them properly, and have great music--these things matter to us, and we'll spend what's necessary to make sure everyone has a great time celebrating with us.
It doesn't matter to me what anyone else does or doesn't do for their wedding. It isn't my business. I just hope if I'm invited to a wedding, the couple is happy, and the food and drinks are good.
I've heard the "save your $ for a home" argument, but we already own our land outright, and broke ground today for our dreamhome. We already do have a hefty downpayment.
Reply:I live in the US, and think it's ridiculous what some people spend. Here is what our wedding cost:
My dress: $650
Reception: $3200 (85 people, alcohol included)
Flowers: $400
Marriage License: $35
Tuxes: $375
Limo: $300
Favors: $120
Flower Girl Dress: $80
Alterations for both: $75
DJ: $300?
Cake: $350
So, not counting the bridesmaids dresses since they paid for those, the cost was $5885. And I wouldn't have done anything differently.
Reply:I think it's insane for people to spend thousands on their wedding. My sister in Montana attended a wedding just a couple of months ago where the wedding cost $100,000. (No kidding.) They had a menu for the guests to order from and everything. She said it was beautiful, and I guess if you have the money to do it, why not? But is it something that is just for show or is it for the sentimental value?
My husband and I did for under $2000. It was small, but we didn't go into debt for it. Sure, looking back, there were things we would do differently, but I wouldn't change the fact we didn't go into debt. One of the best pieces of advice I can offer people is if you can do it yourself, DO IT YOURSELF instead of paying someone to do it. There are things where that wouldn't work, of course, but for the most part, the decorations, the invitations, the food, can all be done by you or family. Course, that does depend on the size of the wedding you want. At any rate, I have thought about becoming a wedding planner myself, but in the end, I think the stressed out brides (who expect their day to be PERFECT) would cause me more stress than I need.
Reply:Good question!
I've never cared about having a "perfect" or "fairy tale" kind of wedding. My wedding isn't just a union between the hubby and me, it's a celebration between us and all of those that love us. That's the most essential thing to remember, as long as we have each other (which is the whole point of the wedding anyways!) and our family and friends, we're set :)
I'm spending less than 5k on my wedding (shocking when a lot of people pay around 25k!). We're having buffet style and my grandma, mom and I are doing a lot of the baking. We love to bake and have always baked together (it's how we bond LOL). All my family and friends are coming to a huge reception (which we're decorating ourselves) and going to dance and celebrate all night long.
I'm really excited :)
Reply:What I did wrong...spent way to much money and didnt focus on what matters most. That you love this person and that you want to spend the rest of your life with them. If I were to do it again I would have a huge back yard BBQ, with only our closest friends and family. Id say come on over, we are getting married, oh and could you bring a bag of chips. lol.
Reply:I so agree with you, I am planning a wedding and have been doing searches on-line to find items to use. My budget-- 600$ for the whole thing!!
It takes some creativity and thinking outside the box but it can be done. I just don't believe in spending tons of money on a party per sae, but I do believe in making it a special and remembered day.
This is especially true for first timers, why blow all that money on a wedding when you could start your married life debt free, or invest in a home ? It just doesn't make sense, but that is just my own practical view :)
Reply:I agree with you! Thankfully, I've been married for 15 years and my wedding, while nice and professionally done, was not over the top! We were married at a place in Laguna Beach CA that offered the ceremony upstairs and receptions downstairs. They handled everything except the DJ, the flowers, pictures and our clothes. We had about 100 guests and I think the night cost us about $5000, I believe. My dress cost $600 and my bridesmaids dresses cost them each about $70. To this day, people tell me how much fun our wedding was and that is exactly what I wanted. Frankly, I would have gone to Vegas but my mother-in-law wanted us to have a big wedding (she doesn't have daughters) and she paid for everything. I was never the girl who dreamed of the big fancy wedding. They always seemed kind of pointless to me. And, lately, it seems that more emphasis is placed on the wedding and not the marriage.
Reply:I'm not a victim yet but I will be in another year when I start planning my wedding. Its almost impossible to have a wedding on a zero budget. My fiance and I do not have much money and we are going to end up paying for everything ourself. There is no way we can afford a 5 thousand dollar DEPOSIT on a location. Why does it have to be such an exorbitant (sp?) amount of money just to get married.
We are going to have to scrap and save for our wedding and even then it will not be a big production. I do believe the U.S. Wedding industry is out to hijack couples and take advantage. Its not fair to compromise your vision because the couple cannot afford to put themselves in debt just to get married.
Reply:We were only planning a VERY small wedding, and got scared off at the first hurdle (ring-buying, or rather just 'ring-contemplating') by the nightmarish creatures posing as salespeople in the jewellery store. They descended on us and were shoving anything and everything in our faces, some awful woman was asking me 'SO, HOW MUCH IS HE SPENDING??? HE SHOULD BE SPENDING AT LEAST X AMOUNT, YOU KNOW!!!', as if that was the secret trick to turn me into some harpy who would be demanding half a year's salary to be spent on my ring. Ugh.
So, we thought 'f*** that - no way are we dealing with this crap every step of the way', bought a couple of cheap 'temporary' rings elsewhere, and promptly got married, (without any guests at all) in the courthouse. Total wedding budget... the cost of the marriage licence plus the clothes we chose for the day. Not much.
We might try again, have some sort of a reception thing next year, but make very very very very sure not to have to deal with ANYONE (or any company) that makes it their business to rip people off just because they're getting married. The whole thing left a very nasty taste in my mouth - I have no idea how anyone actually goes through with organising a proper wedding, the whole industry that surrounds it is so loathsome!!
Reply:My most expensive part of the wedding attire was my bridal veil. It was $40.00. lol That was back in 1974! I made my floor length satin wedding gown and that was $20.00 for all of the materials. I also made the bridesmaid dresses and they were $10.00 each to make. The color was determined by what was on sale. (although blue was my favorite color, I had to settle for yellow dresses) I don't remember what the tux's cost to rent at that time. Had about 100 people at the wedding and church ladies made the food and my MIL provided the cake and the flowers. I remember the cake was $40.00 but didn't know how much the flowers were. The bridesmaids carried 1 yellow rose while I had a bouquet of white roses. We did have a professional photographer and I think photos ran $150. so that was to me the essential part of the wedding.... or so I thought.
As for what I would do different, I wouldn't have married my first husband. lol
The second time I was married in 1985, I was a professional cake decorator, so had that covered. lol I also did the flowers and I bought and wore a cream knee length dress that cost around $25.00 and my husband wore his air force uniform . We had a garden wedding with about 25 people. Oh yes and I illustrated and printed our wedding invitations. My mom and sisters made food for the reception, so it was quite simple. Just had simple snap shots. I think what I would have done different was to have had a professional photographer as the years have faded the photos.
When my daughter was married 7 years ago, her gown was less than $100. We went to the JC Penny outlet and we got all of her bridesmaids gowns for $10 each. Again color was determined by the price which was peach. Again I made the wedding cake and by then I was working at a floral shop and got all of the flowers wholesale as a perk of the job. I paid $150. which seemed like alot, but there were loads of flowers at her wedding! Her husband's parents were convieniently caterers. I don't remember what her photos cost but they were done by a professional photographer.
It seems some weddings are no longer a celebration of love but a show of money! I am in this business and I see it all.
Remember ‘home made weddings’ when aunts prepared their favorite food, sisters and cousins would decorate and arrange flowers, while mom and bride made favors and the veil! It was a time to reflect, to enjoy family, to share the experience.
In other countries this is still the norm, but does the US consumer mentality and the wedding industry that encourages it, forget what a wedding is for?
What, in your opinion %26amp; country is the most essential part of a wedding, what is/was your budget, what did you end up spending %26amp; what would you do different?
Are you becoming a victim of the US Wedding industry?
A B S O L U T E L Y
I agree that the meaining and sacredness of the event is lost and more people are interested in outdoing the next bride and having a party of all parties.
Reply:I agree and I don't....
personally I think it's ridiculous to put yourself into debt for one day. You have your whole lives to plan for and prepare for. Of course you want it to be nice but there is nice and than there is extravagant.
But if you want that... and you have the money to do so (not by charging it all on credit cards) that is totally your business.
Personally my wedding is in March.... we wanted to keep things small and simple, but very nice. We are using friends for DJ and family for photographer. My mom bargained for my dress and I am using her veil and the flower girl dress for my flower girl from her wedding. We are making lots of things. But our wedding is still coming in at about 8000 - 10000 because anything wedding related is so expensive and I think that is the problem with the industry some places really rip you off.
For example you can call and get prices for flowers but if they know the flowers are for a wedding they immediately charge more sometimes.... that's crazy!
I'm happy with our day and I've cut a lot corners and I have two other friends getting married after me or are spending MUCH more and they think I'm crazy... but I bet that my wedding will be as nice as thiers and at the end of the day I'll be just as married lol
Reply:I know a couple who are still $20,000 in debt due to a lavish wedding, 2 years after the DIVORCE! Can you imagine how awful it would be to still be paying for a wedding after you get a divorce. :(
Reply:The wedding industry is like any other. Driven by demand, it is not entirely fair to blame "the industry" without looking at the consumers. Those individuals who run up their credit cards for their wedding will probably go on to run up their credit cards on a plasma tv or vacation. They are victims of a larger problem. The rest of us plan weddings we can afford. I may be a victim to wanting a gorgeous wedding, but if I can afford it whats the problem? Everyone spends their money how they want based on their preferences; thats just simple economics.
Reply:Everyone plans for that one day, they do nothing to prepare for the marriage! It is really sad...that is why there are so many "starter" marriages!!
Reply:We're a US couple, and are resisting getting sucked into the wedding industry vortex. We, do, however want a basically traditional American wedding, like the ones our parents and siblings and friends had. We're living within a budget that's based on how much we could reasonably expect to save between the engagement and the wedding. We agreed not to go into debt for the wedding. So, we're working the wedding around the budget--how many guests, what kind of food, the flowers, the music, photographer, etc. are all tested against the budget. We're a bit ahead on the savings plan, so we're not having to cut things that we had decided on early. But, we're not spending a lot on many things (a couple of hundred on flowers, not a couple of thousand, about a hundred on my wedding dress, we bargained with the DJ and photographer, we're making our own invitations, programs, place cards, reply cards and thank-you cards, using a family heirloom ring, making my veil and the favors and centerpieces, no limo, postponing the honeymoon for four months after the wedding). It's going to be beautiful, but within our $12,000 budget, no debt.
Really, the only critical part of the wedding is the he, I, an officiant and two witnesses be there. Everything else is extra.
Reply:According to Forbes the average US wedding is something like $26,000. This is outrageous and ridiculous.
What's really crazy is that some couples take out loans and get into huge debts just to have this 'perfect' wedding. Then they live in some crappy rented apartment, when they could have used the wedding money as a down payment on a nice house.
Reply:Weddings and Funerals are the worst industries out there because they prey on human emotion and they get you when you are at your most vulnerable.
People should always go for the wedding that they can afford rather than the wedding of their dreams, or, wait until they can afford the wedding of their dreams without selling their soul to the credit card companies. Some people do not have self control and you cannot blame anyone for that.
Good luck
Reply:We don't have a budget-we're spending whatever it costs to get the things we want. We will end up spending about $25-30K when it's all said and done.
I do not recall home made weddings-I'm 38 years old and never been to one in my life and have also never personally known anyone who has had one. We just don't do that where I'm from (NE Pennsylvania).
I figure I waited 38 years to marry the man of my dreams (first wedding for both of us), and we earn income sufficient to not have to worry about every single cent we spend. We're doing our wedding our way, and things cost money. We'll earn more.
We aren't having any bridal party, no programs or favors, only spending $200 on the photographer, and less than that on flowers. His wedding attire only cost $65. We are, however spending lots of plane tix and hotel rooms for our families to fly to St Thomas, wine and dine them properly, and have great music--these things matter to us, and we'll spend what's necessary to make sure everyone has a great time celebrating with us.
It doesn't matter to me what anyone else does or doesn't do for their wedding. It isn't my business. I just hope if I'm invited to a wedding, the couple is happy, and the food and drinks are good.
I've heard the "save your $ for a home" argument, but we already own our land outright, and broke ground today for our dreamhome. We already do have a hefty downpayment.
Reply:I live in the US, and think it's ridiculous what some people spend. Here is what our wedding cost:
My dress: $650
Reception: $3200 (85 people, alcohol included)
Flowers: $400
Marriage License: $35
Tuxes: $375
Limo: $300
Favors: $120
Flower Girl Dress: $80
Alterations for both: $75
DJ: $300?
Cake: $350
So, not counting the bridesmaids dresses since they paid for those, the cost was $5885. And I wouldn't have done anything differently.
Reply:I think it's insane for people to spend thousands on their wedding. My sister in Montana attended a wedding just a couple of months ago where the wedding cost $100,000. (No kidding.) They had a menu for the guests to order from and everything. She said it was beautiful, and I guess if you have the money to do it, why not? But is it something that is just for show or is it for the sentimental value?
My husband and I did for under $2000. It was small, but we didn't go into debt for it. Sure, looking back, there were things we would do differently, but I wouldn't change the fact we didn't go into debt. One of the best pieces of advice I can offer people is if you can do it yourself, DO IT YOURSELF instead of paying someone to do it. There are things where that wouldn't work, of course, but for the most part, the decorations, the invitations, the food, can all be done by you or family. Course, that does depend on the size of the wedding you want. At any rate, I have thought about becoming a wedding planner myself, but in the end, I think the stressed out brides (who expect their day to be PERFECT) would cause me more stress than I need.
Reply:Good question!
I've never cared about having a "perfect" or "fairy tale" kind of wedding. My wedding isn't just a union between the hubby and me, it's a celebration between us and all of those that love us. That's the most essential thing to remember, as long as we have each other (which is the whole point of the wedding anyways!) and our family and friends, we're set :)
I'm spending less than 5k on my wedding (shocking when a lot of people pay around 25k!). We're having buffet style and my grandma, mom and I are doing a lot of the baking. We love to bake and have always baked together (it's how we bond LOL). All my family and friends are coming to a huge reception (which we're decorating ourselves) and going to dance and celebrate all night long.
I'm really excited :)
Reply:What I did wrong...spent way to much money and didnt focus on what matters most. That you love this person and that you want to spend the rest of your life with them. If I were to do it again I would have a huge back yard BBQ, with only our closest friends and family. Id say come on over, we are getting married, oh and could you bring a bag of chips. lol.
Reply:I so agree with you, I am planning a wedding and have been doing searches on-line to find items to use. My budget-- 600$ for the whole thing!!
It takes some creativity and thinking outside the box but it can be done. I just don't believe in spending tons of money on a party per sae, but I do believe in making it a special and remembered day.
This is especially true for first timers, why blow all that money on a wedding when you could start your married life debt free, or invest in a home ? It just doesn't make sense, but that is just my own practical view :)
Reply:I agree with you! Thankfully, I've been married for 15 years and my wedding, while nice and professionally done, was not over the top! We were married at a place in Laguna Beach CA that offered the ceremony upstairs and receptions downstairs. They handled everything except the DJ, the flowers, pictures and our clothes. We had about 100 guests and I think the night cost us about $5000, I believe. My dress cost $600 and my bridesmaids dresses cost them each about $70. To this day, people tell me how much fun our wedding was and that is exactly what I wanted. Frankly, I would have gone to Vegas but my mother-in-law wanted us to have a big wedding (she doesn't have daughters) and she paid for everything. I was never the girl who dreamed of the big fancy wedding. They always seemed kind of pointless to me. And, lately, it seems that more emphasis is placed on the wedding and not the marriage.
Reply:I'm not a victim yet but I will be in another year when I start planning my wedding. Its almost impossible to have a wedding on a zero budget. My fiance and I do not have much money and we are going to end up paying for everything ourself. There is no way we can afford a 5 thousand dollar DEPOSIT on a location. Why does it have to be such an exorbitant (sp?) amount of money just to get married.
We are going to have to scrap and save for our wedding and even then it will not be a big production. I do believe the U.S. Wedding industry is out to hijack couples and take advantage. Its not fair to compromise your vision because the couple cannot afford to put themselves in debt just to get married.
Reply:We were only planning a VERY small wedding, and got scared off at the first hurdle (ring-buying, or rather just 'ring-contemplating') by the nightmarish creatures posing as salespeople in the jewellery store. They descended on us and were shoving anything and everything in our faces, some awful woman was asking me 'SO, HOW MUCH IS HE SPENDING??? HE SHOULD BE SPENDING AT LEAST X AMOUNT, YOU KNOW!!!', as if that was the secret trick to turn me into some harpy who would be demanding half a year's salary to be spent on my ring. Ugh.
So, we thought 'f*** that - no way are we dealing with this crap every step of the way', bought a couple of cheap 'temporary' rings elsewhere, and promptly got married, (without any guests at all) in the courthouse. Total wedding budget... the cost of the marriage licence plus the clothes we chose for the day. Not much.
We might try again, have some sort of a reception thing next year, but make very very very very sure not to have to deal with ANYONE (or any company) that makes it their business to rip people off just because they're getting married. The whole thing left a very nasty taste in my mouth - I have no idea how anyone actually goes through with organising a proper wedding, the whole industry that surrounds it is so loathsome!!
Reply:My most expensive part of the wedding attire was my bridal veil. It was $40.00. lol That was back in 1974! I made my floor length satin wedding gown and that was $20.00 for all of the materials. I also made the bridesmaid dresses and they were $10.00 each to make. The color was determined by what was on sale. (although blue was my favorite color, I had to settle for yellow dresses) I don't remember what the tux's cost to rent at that time. Had about 100 people at the wedding and church ladies made the food and my MIL provided the cake and the flowers. I remember the cake was $40.00 but didn't know how much the flowers were. The bridesmaids carried 1 yellow rose while I had a bouquet of white roses. We did have a professional photographer and I think photos ran $150. so that was to me the essential part of the wedding.... or so I thought.
As for what I would do different, I wouldn't have married my first husband. lol
The second time I was married in 1985, I was a professional cake decorator, so had that covered. lol I also did the flowers and I bought and wore a cream knee length dress that cost around $25.00 and my husband wore his air force uniform . We had a garden wedding with about 25 people. Oh yes and I illustrated and printed our wedding invitations. My mom and sisters made food for the reception, so it was quite simple. Just had simple snap shots. I think what I would have done different was to have had a professional photographer as the years have faded the photos.
When my daughter was married 7 years ago, her gown was less than $100. We went to the JC Penny outlet and we got all of her bridesmaids gowns for $10 each. Again color was determined by the price which was peach. Again I made the wedding cake and by then I was working at a floral shop and got all of the flowers wholesale as a perk of the job. I paid $150. which seemed like alot, but there were loads of flowers at her wedding! Her husband's parents were convieniently caterers. I don't remember what her photos cost but they were done by a professional photographer.
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